Monday, September 3, 2007@11:14 AM

Blood Topaz

Written by: WZ
Reviewed by: Glamour_Diva

Criteria Breakdown:

1* Title – 5/5
Blood Topaz was a nice name for the story. The vampires and slayers would sure create a bloody scene together!!

2* Forewords – 10/10
Nice!! You described everything in detail. You also gave us some information of what vampires and slayers were. Good! It would be easier to understand.

3* Appearance – 10/10
Okay. Since your story is kind of new for now, I’ll let you off the hook! Although the backgrounds of most vampire stories are black, you made a nice choice of using other colors, because your story is actually quite…happy! Not scary… yet! Nice choice for the color of the fonts by the way!

4* Originality and Creativity – 15/15
Very original!! A girl who you think is only the girl next door is actually a slayer!! Nice! The slayers are like they’re on mission by the way!! I don’t know how’s the story’s going to go since it’s only the beginning, but the setting is great!!

5* Plot – 14/15
You made it pretty clear how the story is going to go in the forewords. And so far, I like it. Still wondering how this story is going to end…Anyway, keep up the good work!

6* Story Flow – 7/10
You wrote great! You give great description for everything and everyone! But sometimes, I don’t understand what you’re writing.
Example: As I fumed, I realized the only thing that would keep my dear sister from her beloved job would be that. (What is ‘that’?)
And for the touching-and-I’ll-see-your-memories thing, you should specify it more, ‘cause at the end of the first chapter, it took me a while to understand.

7* Language: (Spelling, Grammar) – 13/15
Your use of language was overall okay. I didn’t catch any spelling mistakes. Though some grammar errors. Be careful, and you’ll be fine!

8* Writing Style – 10/10
Love your writing style! It was quite neat! It was… good!! I don’t know how to explain, but I love how you describe stuffs and you did well with explaining what Ri In was thinking. Nice!!

9* Reader Friendly – 9/10
Very friendly. However, perhaps personal comments would get you full marks…

Total: 93 Marks
Bonus: 0/3 (sorry, you didn’t link back… though this site is actually yours. xd)